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This has become a very popular plumb line for judging mastery. Studies showed 10,000 hours was the average practice time to reach this level in musicianship and it seems to have been applied to multiple skills since. I look at this and think, how long have I been in the GM seat?
Adding up my weekly gaming for the past 8 years I fall short…by a lot! Including conventions, and other pick-up games, my time has only reached around 1400 hours (at this rate, I’ll reach mastery when I’m 80). When I say that I am no expert, it’s true, but I am by no means cutting my teeth on the game master’s guides. I am in a position, when someone asks for my advice or opinion on running a game, I can share with confidence. Let me tell you, it feels good to be asked. This means others see that I have experience enough to have an intelligent opinion. They want to know how I handle social encounters, combat, player antics, homebrewing, and even tips for adjusting a pre-written campaign. Most importantly, I do not expect others to do what I do. Everyone has their own play style and that spills into how they run a game too. I only offer what I do in hopes that it inspires ideas for their own games.
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When we sit down at a table (or online) to roleplay, there are many things that you would not expect to come up. There is an unwritten social contract that everyone expects to be adhered to, but no one really wants to address. Quite frankly, they shouldn’t have to address it. Most of it is common sense and anything that doesn’t seem that way should be cued in body language. Let’s talk about it.
Anything sexual! Interparty and NPC romances, or intimate relations can be fun to play, but there is a point where a “black curtain” must fall. This is not just because it’ll quickly become X rated, but it also becomes awkward among all players. Non-consensual actions are a HARD PASS! We are GMs, we should be giving our players agency at every turn and this includes relationships. However, if it becomes unwanted, we must step in. If a player becomes uncomfortable with the advances of another, talk to those involved. If it doesn’t stop, ask the pushy player to leave, even if it is the GM. Bullying! Using real or perceived power over another is not just rude, but can be considered bullying. This will quickly result in a complete civil war around the table and players WILL take it personally. As GMs, this is a fine balance which can be mitigated with player agency. Allowing the characters to retreat and/or retaliate can keep it from being overwhelming (afterall, isn’t this most of the battles…to take out an oppressor?). However, if this becomes a problem at the table, take that player aside and discuss it directly and immediately. If the action continues, ask that player to leave, even if it is the GM. Not listening to the players. This one I’m talking to the GMs. If one of the players brings up a problem, you must address it. Do not pass the responsibility to someone else. Apologize if necessary for not catching the issue yourself, then DO SOMETHING! Allowing it to go on, there will be tension in the group and it will take away some of the trust that had been built between all the players. Talk to the player creating the problem, if it continues, ask that player to leave. Some of these things can be avoided simply by watching the body language of your players. A lot can be seen when they are uncomfortable or disagree with what might be happening. Some signs to watch out for: checking out, not making eye contact, nervous giggling, shocked expressions, shaking heads, leaving the table for a break, and that’s just a start. There are body language experts who have written books or speak about this on YouTube. Do some research if you are not sure about what to look for. I will leave you with a final thought. Asking someone to leave your table is not easy, but it is better for everyone involved. It keeps the other players feeling safe and supported. It shows that you are not going to accept this kind of behavior. Once these bitter, guilty, and uneasy feelings subside, your group will be stronger than ever. I am currently working on a mini-campaign with another GM. This will be broken down into four one-shots that could be played consecutively to make a full campaign. We are going to premiere this at a convention next year. Fingers crossed that we pull it off and it is received warmly.
Ideally, you do not want to offer up a session as a one-shot that requires any significant background knowledge. This proves to be an obstacle that we are working on overcoming. We want anyone to be able to sit at the table during any one of the sessions and still receive a full, enjoyable experience. What brought this on? Well, at one of the conventions that we provided game play at, we had several people who wanted more. We were pulling out older one-shots and scheduling times outside of the convention to provide this opportunity for them. This mini-campaign was created with these guests in mind. We want to provide a full adventure with several sessions in which they could take one character on a journey. I’m sure we’ll have hiccups, things may feel disjointed, others will drop in and out. This is our first attempt and we will learn from it to make the next time better. We hope that the guests also enjoy this and keep joining us at the table to experience the full adventure. As a GM, you have a lot of resources out there to give you tips and tricks of the trade. This advice is there to aid you in developing your best game possible. Listen to it. Test it. Learn from it. Ultimately though, this is your game table. Here are some things I’ve learned over the last 10 years I’ve been running weekly games.
-It’s not about me. It might be my game table, but it’s not solely my story. My players want to be involved and see how their actions affect the world around them. I move the spotlight and it should never really shine on me. A GM should be the facilitator of the group’s actions, not the dictator. Sure, provide some challenging encounters, but it doesn’t have to be a death match every battle/session. Also realize that you may need to remind the players what their characters know or hear, perhaps right after it is said. Don’t be afraid to guide the players through this. -A group can make or break the game. My group has a lot of other GMs. Giving the story over to them is easy, but I still run into some of the same issues. My players don’t always take good notes, get distracted, or even check out during a combat. What makes it work is that they are invested (even if they don’t look like it at times). They make the effort to guide the story and try to improve their own roleplaying to truly get into character at the table. -If it’s not fun, it’s wrong. Pick up on what your players are trying to do and run with it. Give them opportunities to do epic stunts. I adjust the enemies on the fly a lot to ensure my players are having fun; in turn, this makes it fun for me as well. Disclaimer, not every session will be fun, some are quite tense. These nights are looked back upon often with satisfaction because something was resolved either in character or between players. I admit, I have a great group! We have played together for many years now and have built trust not only around the table, but through friendships that will last a lifetime. I want this for every group. Take it one session at a time, listen to your players and adjust the story. Remember, you are not just playing a game, you are having shared experiences. |
AuthorJodie 
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October 2025
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