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We often feel the need to get all of our players involved in the story and stay active at the table. Sometimes we are expected, by the players, to do this as well. I want to tell you that it takes two (and possibly all of the players) to make this happen.
I encourage my players not to take a backseat when I have one person in the spotlight. We are all the main characters of our lives, but we are supporting characters in the lives of others. Be a supporting character! As a GM, you have the power to provide examples and leave the door open for your players to become that support. One way I do this is by allowing time for my players to have those interactions. I ask, “Is there anything you would like to do before morning (or the next thing in the plot)?” I give my players time to think about what their character might be doing. Some take advantage and go talk to an NPC, go shopping, knock on another player’s door for a conversation, or something else entirely. Others just shrug their shoulders and tell me “No” and that is okay too. Sidenote: I do not do this during a one-shot. I have only 3-4 hours to get from start to finish, so adding this extra time does not really work. I will give them time if they need to talk through clues or plan their next action though. If a player comes to me and says they feel like they are not getting enough attention, or I am ignoring them, I bring up the times where I ask those questions. I also encourage them to involve themselves in the other characters’ stories. “Ask them what you can do to help them achieve their goals,” I say. I also ask them to interject on their own behalf. I am okay with interruptions to retroactively do something that the player wanted to do. Encouraging players to speak up, and interject, provides for them a safe place to try new things. They learn quickly that I rarely say no. Most often it is a curious expression with, “Sure, let’s try it.” Do not feel responsible for getting all players involved, they all have different comfortability levels when it comes to roleplaying. It is your responsibility, as a GM, to provide an open space for them to interject as they feel comfortable.
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Most GMs do not believe they are professional, unless they get paid to do this. Knowledge of the game is also a way to be considered ‘professional.’ However, GMs do a lot of people handling too. Working with hurt feelings, dealing with tension, being an encouragement, and more, often fall onto my plate. How do you handle all of this while still putting out an enjoyable game for all?
I have mediocre people skills. I’m kind, a decent listener, and try to be fair in all things, but I do not do well with conflict (personally I think this shows in my combats). I’ve had to work things out with my players on an individual basis, and sometimes that includes some harsh conversation. I have been used as a therapist and counselor for things in and out of games. I want to be a friend to all my players, and for the most part, I succeed. BUT…I’m no professional. I’m not certified to be giving life coaching to my group, or even psychological advice. What I can do is provide a listening ear, and share my own life experience. Back home we call this “front porch therapy.” Imagine two old women rocking on the front porch sipping tea or knitting a blanket when a grandson flops down on the stairs. “What’s on your mind, Johnny?” one of them asks. Then it all comes out, Johnny’s been trying to get a girl’s attention by poking and teasing. Of course the two women cackle a bit before informing Johnny that isn’t quite the best way to get a girl’s attention. They talk a bit about love and crushes when they were young while Johnny listens intently for advice. Before long, he gets what he’s looking for and moves on, leaving them to their tea and knitting. I’m like one of those women for my players, at least I hope so. I hope they take to heart what I say and weigh it for themselves. I do not want to be seen as if I know it all (in or out of game). If you notice things with your group, pull them aside or call and ask them what’s going on. Then provide that listening ear. If you need to, work through it together. You’ll form deeper bonds with players from being that support. That is the question. I’ve noticed lately a lot of videos and comments about whether or not to hide your die rolls as a GM. There are a plethora of reasons to do it either way, and you can find support with whichever way you choose to go. Personally, I hide my dice.
I am a notoriously poor roller when it comes to dice. I lose at Risk, Mousetrap, and any other game that requires me to have decent outcomes at least 50% of the time. When I build characters, I usually do a spellcaster and make sure the spells will still do half damage if I do not succeed. If I build something else, I look for ways to get enough bonuses that it is nearly impossible to fail (I will still find a way, trust me). So as a GM, I hide my rolls. Hiding my rolls allows me to manipulate the outcomes to keep a story flowing and combat challenging. Do I fudge my rolls? YES! Not all the time, but sometimes. If my players do not receive some kind of challenge, they get bored. My combats are usually easy enough as it is, I don’t need to allow my poor rolling to give the players success after one hit. So, if I fudge my rolls, what’s the point of rolling to begin with? The illusion of randomness. I want my players to be immersed in a story. If we are in combat, I want my players to be on the edge of their seats and without rolling, my players will start to feel like their rolls don’t matter either. They will think, “The GM already has the story and outcomes determined, so why bother.” That’s not why I fudge my rolls. I do not pre-determine any outcomes (the only pre-determination I do is try not to kill the party). I like to reward creativity in combat by making the BBEG miss after their maneuver. I like to make my BBEGs hit after a particular taunting or monologue by a player. If I have a player that seems to consistently miss one night, I’ll hold up on actually hitting them until they have a success. Most importantly, I like my players to walk away saying, “That was a good game, I had fun.” I don’t have to put them in a life/death situation to make that happen. I give them puzzles, conspiracies, or unique abilities of a BBEG. They don’t have to survive a combat to have fun, just put some clues together, find a new piece to the puzzle, or intimidate someone into cooperation. Hide or show? Do what makes it fun for your table. I’ve been particularly bad about posting this year. I hit over 100 posts and my brain just stopped. What was I going to write about next? I don’t want to rehash old topics too much, so I need more ideas. In the meantime, I will share my blessings.
I am very grateful for the group I play with every week. I couldn’t ask for anything better. Individually, we are very different people. We are in various stages of life, have different hobbies and interests, and our own ‘stuff’ to work through, but we come together to enjoy three hours each Tuesday. Sure, we share with each other some of life’s struggles and support each other as best we can, but that’s not the focus of game night. Through this we have developed closer friendships, deeper understanding, and a joint love of the game we are all a part of. We have also put it out there for others to watch and experience in their own way. Three years of streaming, ten years of sharing the table, and we feel like we’ve just gotten started. Look out for other shenanigans as we continue to grow. When you first start running games, you fear doing things wrong. That fear can be crippling and often leads to other negative thoughts. Some of these can warp into self deprecation making you think you’re not good enough, funny enough, creative enough, etc. Let me be clear here. You are enough!
The more I watch other GMs talk about what to do (or not), I realize that it is simply an opinion. There are no real hard rules on running a game, just suggestions. One in particular I would strongly recommend following like staying consistent with rulings, but others depend entirely upon your gaming group. No one is here to give you scores, this is no competition, and you’re not going to get fired (trust me, your players are happy that you have taken on this role). Probably the number one advice I could give first time GMs is to have fun. This is ultimately a game. Meet in a tavern, fight the bandits, save the princess, be rewarded by the king. You do not have to come up with everything on your own. Then, listen to your players as they suggest different ideas and stash it away for the future (or add them on the fly if you are comfortable with it). The more you run games, the bigger your GM chest of story plots, monsters, NPCs, etc. will grow, and with it…more confidence to continue the journey. I’m diving into new territory. Interparty romance. Two players want a bit more from their characters and they will do so off screen. I made this decision due to multiple factors, and player comfortability is one of them. I want the other players to still be comfortable at the table, and I want these two players to feel free to go as they see fit.
This does not work for everyone! Before anything can happen, trust must be built first, and you must know your players well. It can create tension between players if they don’t trust you or each other, especially if the characters will become intimate. It is very important to have the players talk it out together to determine any sensitive topics or actions to avoid, and when the curtain needs to be drawn. Some of the discoveries and the aftermath will be talked about on screen, when these two meet up with the rest of the group. I leave it mostly to them as to what will be discussed. Not all GMs are as lucky as I am, I have a table of gamemasters that can determine when and how much information is disclosed to the group. When I set up these “encounters,” I still give them a plot hook and often a plot twist. These moments give them something to share with the rest of the group that keeps them in “the know.” Bringing it back on screen can present its own challenges though. I am not going to lie, I am nervous about sharing what takes place privately between these two characters. Constantly trying to watch for actions or descriptions that could be triggering to viewers is tough. So, as I navigate this new experience, I’ll try to share what I’ve learned. If you have done anything like this, please share your experiences. Dice are often used for determining outcomes of various decisions. In our games, it allows for characters to succeed or fail in skills, especially when the player is not particularly skilled in that area (Persuasion) or it is just not possible to do this at the table (Acrobatics). However, these checks can become distracting to the game if called for too often.
If every move a character makes requires a die roll, it will become daunting to do anything. This will slow down the game and often discourage players from trying different things. Also, if the actions should be natural for the character, leave those dice on the table. Logically, if he fails the roll, it becomes even more frustrating for the player. Calling for checks among the group can also cause some issues. When one member of the party begins to sneak around, the others should have a general idea where they may be (especially if they have traveled together for a while). If one character thinks another may be hiding a secret, no insight should be rolled, just give them time to have a conversation. If you call for those rolls, and they fail, the player now has to pretend they do not have the knowledge that they derived through roleplaying. For example, Angelica acts weird in a situation and draws the attention of Brigham. He asks Angelica if there is anything wrong. When Angelica says “no,” the DM calls for Brigham to roll insight. He gets a 6. Now, the player for Brigham has to play as though he is ignorant of what the player naturally feels about the situation. The issue will be dropped and he will assume how she acted was natural. In reality, the player for Angelica may have wanted to explore a little of her backstory and have a good character interaction with Brigham. Personally, if a player is skeptical of actions or information from another player, or even an NPC, I let them run with it. If they ask me to roll, I’ll have them do so and either confirm what they are thinking, or put them at ease. I don’t tell them to roll for things like that unless they are completely missing the clue. I have heard other GMs disclose their rule when calling for rolls, and I like it. If there is a chance for failure, then ask them to roll. Do not take this too far though, because that chance is always there, but keep it logical. Also, if there is no chance for success you do not need a roll either (you cannot jump to the moon). Most importantly, do not let dice rolling bog down the flow of the story. Every group starts somewhere. From someone gathering friends to try a “new” type of game to complete strangers meeting in a local game store (or online) because they are looking for new friends to play with, each table top is surrounded by people who chose to be there. What happens in those early steps?
Showing up at a store (or online) and sitting down at a table is the easy part for those who are looking for a group. After sitting down, it becomes a bit more difficult. You begin to interact with these strangers and decide if this is the table for you. I’ll be honest, some you’ll like immediately, others…not so much. Don’t take it personally, it is different for everybody. Gathering friends to start playing seems the more tiresome task when starting a home game. Getting commitment from others can feel like beating your head against a wall at times, but don’t give up. Eventually you’ll nail down a date and time for all to sit at your table. Run the game, get feedback (especially from the ones that tried it for the first time), and set the next date. Honestly, getting a regular time to meet is the best option. This allows for the players to plan in advance and keep their schedule clear if possible. Things will come up and they will have to miss a session here or there, but if it becomes consistent, you may want to give them a call. Whether you play with strangers that are yet to become friends, or a group of friends at home, don’t give up after just one session. It takes a little while to get to know each other and become comfortable in roleplaying. Each time you try, you will learn more about yourself and be able to pick the right game for you. Everybody loves a mysterious letter, a locked box, or a map at the table. The players become even more engaged when there are objects to interact with. All of this material takes time to prepare though. With a little creativity and time to put it together, your players will love it. When you play online, we are not able to pass around the map or read that letter, so how do you provide some engagement with objects? Well, you don’t…not really.
Sitting around a table with your players comes with a lot of benefits. In person roleplay not only allows for better communication, but also provides a shared experience when a material is given to the group. Watching the excitement spread across the table is a simple joy for myself, the GM, that just does not replicate online. So we have to compromise. The number one tool can be done through online programs. Maps are good for spatial awareness and strategies for the players and there are several ways to display this to your players (I’m not listing them here, I trust you can find those). Other things can be mailed or emailed to your players if you want them to receive something privately, or email the whole group for a grand reveal. In one game, my players had frequent dreams that I would text to each of them, individually, and allow them to share with the group when they wanted to. What I’m doing in my current campaign are newsletters. I have started creating articles with generic pictures about things that are happening in the world around them periodically. Some of these articles include the events that the players were involved with or affected. My players seem to be enjoying these as they do bring them up in game and in text discussions outside of the game. I will not commit myself to giving them one every week, or even every other week, but I am trying to send them out during major in-game downtimes. If you are at the table, consider what kind of materials you could give your players to aid in their engagement with the story and the world they are exploring. Get creative. No matter how silly it may seem, your players will recognize the effort you put into it and appreciate it. Don’t let being online stop you either. If your group meets online, or even play by post, you can still do this through email, text messages, or even snail mail. Be creative, think outside the box, and ask for advice from others to come up with engaging material you can give your players. Most D&D campaigns stop before any characters reach this level in D&D. Some stop because of outside forces such as scheduling conflicts or interest, but others are cut short by the GM because high levels are overpowered. This creates issues in arranging combats and even encounters with NPCs.
The people of the world know these characters. If they have reached level 20, they are world renowned at what they do, nearly celebrities (some have even saved the world from complete destruction). These NPCs will have some shock and awe when they walk through their town, provide free lodging and meals, ask for blessings on their children, and possibly hold celebrations. This can slow down any session if you take it too extreme. I skip all of that. Typically, when I let players use a level 20 character it will be for a one-shot. This means we have no time for antics, we go straight to the issue. Mainly, I have to be prepared for combat. Planning monsters and their environments can be overwhelming. I cannot rely solely on challenge ratings or formulas provided to do this. I have to take a look at the characters, know how many times and how hard they can hit, what kind of spells are going to be cast, special abilities that could insta-kill my bad guy, etc. Look through what monsters are available to me and possibly adjust them for the inevitable fight. Unfortunately, I am a forgetful person. Once things are in motion, I tend to lose track of the lair actions, legendary actions and resistances, on-going battle effects and more. This does make it easier for my players to take out my monsters, but as long as they are still having fun it’s worth it to me. (Holding up a glass) Here’s to another high level one shot in the books (clink)! One of these days, I’ll remember all the stuff…or not. |
AuthorJodie 
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January 2026
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