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Sitting at my desk I notice quite a plethora of…things. Some are expected, yet others are interesting to say the least. Let’s make this a game. I’m going to list out the various items sitting at my desk and you let me know how many are also sitting at yours.
So, any unusual things you have that I left out? Seems like it is time for me to clean up again. However, I do find it all manages to make its way back to my work space. Surprisingly, I don’t have a set of dice sitting here right now. Let me know how many you have sitting at your desk.
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I have been running games for many years now (still a long way from mastery), but even I get moments where I don’t feel good enough. When preparing for adventures, I get nervous that I do not know the rules or scenarios well. I can get in my head as if it were the first time I had ever done this.
Preparing for another convention and I find myself staring at my shelf. The many adventures that hold themselves there do not draw my attention. I have a homebrew adventure that I have to get ready for later that also does not speak to me. I am beginning to think I’ve lost my momentum. How do I get my drive back? One foot in front of the other. This is the best way forward. Eventually I’ll get back on track and start to feel like I know what I’m doing again. A few successful runs and all will be well. Or so I tell myself. Seriously though, getting excited about running one-shots again is actually difficult. The first step is reading, then re-reading the adventures I’m thinking of doing. I have to allow myself time to think through it and build from there (maybe even build some new pre-generated characters). I love talking about roleplaying, I love meeting new people and seeing old friends, and I love providing opportunities for others to play and have fun. Remembering why I take the time to read, prepare, and run these games helps me move forward…one step at a time. When running a game in what I have coined “discovery” style, it can become difficult to keep track of your world and lore. I have notes in a book with ideas and moving pieces, but even with that things get lost (or just switched around). So how do I keep it together? Honestly, I don’t.
As I was running through some of the things that have taken place in my current campaign, I discovered I’m missing a lot from my notes. I don’t have all the names and places that my players have encountered, and along with it is missing any details surrounding the events. I do have one player that likes to take extensive notes. She told me that she was having some trouble keeping track of who’s who, so I suggested making a “murder” board. She took that and ran with it. I now have something I can refer to for my world. Since then, she has realized that I am using it to help myself remember what’s going on as well, and now she will not share her theories with me. I shrug my shoulders and let it all roll. I have the overall major moving pieces and where it will all culminate, it’s just a matter of how they’ll get there really. However, I am missing the joy of listening to all the speculations and conspiracy theories my players come up with. In light of this though, I created my own board. However you keep track of the world you campaign is taking place in, be flexible with how the players reach the end. And if things get moved around, go with it and work it into the story somehow, eventually it will all be worth it. Super excited to be a part of conventions or even just to go see my family, but forgetting how much work it is to travel…this is the bane of my existence. I get myself scheduled and book the flights, now I have to pack. What do I plan for? How much should I take?
Lists help. I make lists of things I need for the trip and try to plan for the unexpected. It doesn’t always work, but I get pretty close. For instance, I typically finger brush my hair, but one particular trip it was windy and it was too much. So I bought a hairbrush. Other times it’s that extra game that was not scheduled, so I have to pull from memory another one-shot and hope I have what I need to pull it off. When making lists for packing, length of travel and why I’m traveling are taken into consideration. I’d be in trouble going to Chicago for a convention if my sister wasn’t driving to meet us there. Flying with all my gaming stuff would be a pain to pull off. However, going just down the street has its own list of things. If you begin traveling for your own games, be sure to have a list. What do you need to run the game you are planning? Do you need anything for a fan or artist table? And don’t forget the most important…What are you going to wear? There are a lot of questions as to what works best when you begin scheduling sessions for the gaming group you have put together. How often? Which day? What time? A lot of groups struggle with this very thing, session after session. I have been lucky enough to have a weekly game every Tuesday night since 2017. There are a number of reasons for this. Here are my thoughts on the matter.
First of all, the day of the week is the #1 killer for any regular game. Weekends are rough as that is the time for travel, festivals, sports, and many other events that take place in one’s life. These will be missed frequently by your group. Weekdays are less likely to be missed due to the various events, but come with their own problems. This is where timing comes in at #2. Evenings are generally when people want to play, the end of the day is the best time for this type of stress relief. However, week nights are sacred for the full-time job holder (they need to function in the morning). Try an evening time on a weekend and you’re most likely doomed. Any of these times and days could work, but that is dependent on your players. Players are #3 on my list. No matter what day or time that is chosen, you must have player commitment. These players don’t have to sign away their life in blood or anything, they just cannot call out just because something better came along. If a player is missing every other session because of other things, you’ll need to have a chat about commitment, and take into consideration how often you meet. #4 on my list may seem backwards to everyone else. I do not think any roleplaying game should be regularly scheduled as once a month, and I’m hesitant to even suggest bi-weekly. When you meet so infrequently, one absence is felt dramatically (suddenly you’ve gone weeks without playing together). It can also really cause the story to stutter. I strongly encourage meeting weekly. This way, when someone has to miss it, it's not so bad. I feel I need to explain this a bit more. Missing 1 out of every 4 sessions sounds the same, mathematically, no matter how often you meet. However, if you meet monthly, then you go two months without playing together. Let me tell you, it is hard enough to get players to remember what happened week to week, but two months?! While meeting weekly, then you only go two weeks between sessions. And I know what you are saying, “But, Jodie, that is bi-weekly.” Yeah, but the commitment was for weekly. Your players are going to miss sessions and with weekly sessions it's no big deal. But longer times between sessions allow for other things to creep in and take over your players’ interests and time. So, those are my thoughts on it. My group has been meeting weekly since 2017. We have done multiple long campaigns and several shorter ones, including one-shots. We have cycled through four GMs (I’m the main one) and several additional players. We meet during the week, every week, in the evening, and my players are committed to showing up every time. If you are struggling with a regular group, try something new and drastic…plan for every week. We often feel the need to get all of our players involved in the story and stay active at the table. Sometimes we are expected, by the players, to do this as well. I want to tell you that it takes two (and possibly all of the players) to make this happen.
I encourage my players not to take a backseat when I have one person in the spotlight. We are all the main characters of our lives, but we are supporting characters in the lives of others. Be a supporting character! As a GM, you have the power to provide examples and leave the door open for your players to become that support. One way I do this is by allowing time for my players to have those interactions. I ask, “Is there anything you would like to do before morning (or the next thing in the plot)?” I give my players time to think about what their character might be doing. Some take advantage and go talk to an NPC, go shopping, knock on another player’s door for a conversation, or something else entirely. Others just shrug their shoulders and tell me “No” and that is okay too. Sidenote: I do not do this during a one-shot. I have only 3-4 hours to get from start to finish, so adding this extra time does not really work. I will give them time if they need to talk through clues or plan their next action though. If a player comes to me and says they feel like they are not getting enough attention, or I am ignoring them, I bring up the times where I ask those questions. I also encourage them to involve themselves in the other characters’ stories. “Ask them what you can do to help them achieve their goals,” I say. I also ask them to interject on their own behalf. I am okay with interruptions to retroactively do something that the player wanted to do. Encouraging players to speak up, and interject, provides for them a safe place to try new things. They learn quickly that I rarely say no. Most often it is a curious expression with, “Sure, let’s try it.” Do not feel responsible for getting all players involved, they all have different comfortability levels when it comes to roleplaying. It is your responsibility, as a GM, to provide an open space for them to interject as they feel comfortable. Most GMs do not believe they are professional, unless they get paid to do this. Knowledge of the game is also a way to be considered ‘professional.’ However, GMs do a lot of people handling too. Working with hurt feelings, dealing with tension, being an encouragement, and more, often fall onto my plate. How do you handle all of this while still putting out an enjoyable game for all?
I have mediocre people skills. I’m kind, a decent listener, and try to be fair in all things, but I do not do well with conflict (personally I think this shows in my combats). I’ve had to work things out with my players on an individual basis, and sometimes that includes some harsh conversation. I have been used as a therapist and counselor for things in and out of games. I want to be a friend to all my players, and for the most part, I succeed. BUT…I’m no professional. I’m not certified to be giving life coaching to my group, or even psychological advice. What I can do is provide a listening ear, and share my own life experience. Back home we call this “front porch therapy.” Imagine two old women rocking on the front porch sipping tea or knitting a blanket when a grandson flops down on the stairs. “What’s on your mind, Johnny?” one of them asks. Then it all comes out, Johnny’s been trying to get a girl’s attention by poking and teasing. Of course the two women cackle a bit before informing Johnny that isn’t quite the best way to get a girl’s attention. They talk a bit about love and crushes when they were young while Johnny listens intently for advice. Before long, he gets what he’s looking for and moves on, leaving them to their tea and knitting. I’m like one of those women for my players, at least I hope so. I hope they take to heart what I say and weigh it for themselves. I do not want to be seen as if I know it all (in or out of game). If you notice things with your group, pull them aside or call and ask them what’s going on. Then provide that listening ear. If you need to, work through it together. You’ll form deeper bonds with players from being that support. That is the question. I’ve noticed lately a lot of videos and comments about whether or not to hide your die rolls as a GM. There are a plethora of reasons to do it either way, and you can find support with whichever way you choose to go. Personally, I hide my dice.
I am a notoriously poor roller when it comes to dice. I lose at Risk, Mousetrap, and any other game that requires me to have decent outcomes at least 50% of the time. When I build characters, I usually do a spellcaster and make sure the spells will still do half damage if I do not succeed. If I build something else, I look for ways to get enough bonuses that it is nearly impossible to fail (I will still find a way, trust me). So as a GM, I hide my rolls. Hiding my rolls allows me to manipulate the outcomes to keep a story flowing and combat challenging. Do I fudge my rolls? YES! Not all the time, but sometimes. If my players do not receive some kind of challenge, they get bored. My combats are usually easy enough as it is, I don’t need to allow my poor rolling to give the players success after one hit. So, if I fudge my rolls, what’s the point of rolling to begin with? The illusion of randomness. I want my players to be immersed in a story. If we are in combat, I want my players to be on the edge of their seats and without rolling, my players will start to feel like their rolls don’t matter either. They will think, “The GM already has the story and outcomes determined, so why bother.” That’s not why I fudge my rolls. I do not pre-determine any outcomes (the only pre-determination I do is try not to kill the party). I like to reward creativity in combat by making the BBEG miss after their maneuver. I like to make my BBEGs hit after a particular taunting or monologue by a player. If I have a player that seems to consistently miss one night, I’ll hold up on actually hitting them until they have a success. Most importantly, I like my players to walk away saying, “That was a good game, I had fun.” I don’t have to put them in a life/death situation to make that happen. I give them puzzles, conspiracies, or unique abilities of a BBEG. They don’t have to survive a combat to have fun, just put some clues together, find a new piece to the puzzle, or intimidate someone into cooperation. Hide or show? Do what makes it fun for your table. I’ve been particularly bad about posting this year. I hit over 100 posts and my brain just stopped. What was I going to write about next? I don’t want to rehash old topics too much, so I need more ideas. In the meantime, I will share my blessings.
I am very grateful for the group I play with every week. I couldn’t ask for anything better. Individually, we are very different people. We are in various stages of life, have different hobbies and interests, and our own ‘stuff’ to work through, but we come together to enjoy three hours each Tuesday. Sure, we share with each other some of life’s struggles and support each other as best we can, but that’s not the focus of game night. Through this we have developed closer friendships, deeper understanding, and a joint love of the game we are all a part of. We have also put it out there for others to watch and experience in their own way. Three years of streaming, ten years of sharing the table, and we feel like we’ve just gotten started. Look out for other shenanigans as we continue to grow. When you first start running games, you fear doing things wrong. That fear can be crippling and often leads to other negative thoughts. Some of these can warp into self deprecation making you think you’re not good enough, funny enough, creative enough, etc. Let me be clear here. You are enough!
The more I watch other GMs talk about what to do (or not), I realize that it is simply an opinion. There are no real hard rules on running a game, just suggestions. One in particular I would strongly recommend following like staying consistent with rulings, but others depend entirely upon your gaming group. No one is here to give you scores, this is no competition, and you’re not going to get fired (trust me, your players are happy that you have taken on this role). Probably the number one advice I could give first time GMs is to have fun. This is ultimately a game. Meet in a tavern, fight the bandits, save the princess, be rewarded by the king. You do not have to come up with everything on your own. Then, listen to your players as they suggest different ideas and stash it away for the future (or add them on the fly if you are comfortable with it). The more you run games, the bigger your GM chest of story plots, monsters, NPCs, etc. will grow, and with it…more confidence to continue the journey. |
AuthorJodie 
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March 2026
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